Saturday, October 15, 2011

TGIF: Beware of the False Lover

Today's Prayer
God, please show me how You want me 2 use the skills, spiritual gifts, resources You have given me and the relationships You have allowed me 2 have 2 prepare 4 the great harvest You have planned. I pray that I will be a tool in Your hands 2 draw people 2 You. With that in mind, I ask You 2 please 4give me of my sins, sins that stand in the way of a closer fellowship w/You and that would be a hindrance 2 my living testimony. Please help me start fresh and new again right now. Thank You and bless You, Lord. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.

Beware of the False Lover
TGIF Today God Is First Volume 2, by Os Hillman

Weeping may endure 4 a night, but joy comes in the morning (Ps 30:5).

When a measured assault enters our life we often respond in 2 different ways. The pain caused by the assault drives us 2 a place of either embracing the pain or we embrace anything that will make us feel better. That becomes the entry door 2 a false lover. Men and women each seek 2 avoid pain in different ways. Larry Crabb has summarized these 2 unique strategies often used 2 avoid deep pain:
All of us are trapped by addiction 2 a desire 4 something less than God. For many women, that something less is relational control. "I will not be hurt again and I will not let people I love be hurt. I'll see 2 it that what I fear never happens again." They therefore live in terror of vulnerably presenting themselves 2 anyone and instead become determined managers of people. Their true femininity remains safely tucked away behind the walls of relational control.
More common in men is an addiction 2 non-relational control. "I will experience deep and consuming satisfaction w/o ever having 2 relate meaningfully w/anyone." They keep things shallow and safe w/family and friends and feel driven 2 experience a joy they never feel, a joy that only deep relating can provide. Their commitment is twofold: 2 never risk revealing inadequacy by drawing close 2 people and, w/o breaking that commitment, 2 feel powerful and alive. Power in business and illicit sex are favorite strategies 4 reaching that goal.1
Many times we seek 2 deal w/our pain thru various forms of addictions designed 2 resolve the inner pain we feel. All addictions represent a counterfeit desire for genuine love and intimacy. We conclude these lesser desires are legitimate needs instead of band-aids of our fleshly soul. These addiction lovers become isolation chambers created 4 ourselves designed 2 mask our pain.

Every human being has a desire 2b loved. When we do not feel loved bcoz of some event in our lives we seek 2 reconcile this emotional pain. So, if u are fighting any kind of addiction--over control of people, sex, drugs, alcohol, workaholism, shopping, overeating--u are seeking 2 fill a void only God can fill.

Pain has a useful purpose in our lives. Facing it, rather than medicating it, allows us 2 move 2 a place of discovering a capacity 4 a different kind of joy. That is the purpose of pain. We must let inner pain do its work by experiencing it fully. It feels like a contradiction 2 actually embrace the pain, but it is the only remedy 4 moving past it so it can yield its purpose in our lives. 

Otherwise we will remain unaware of our deeper desire 4 God and be driven toward a false lover.

1 Larry Crabb, Shattered Dreams, Waterbrook Press, Colorado Springs, CO 2001, p.95

Today God Is First (TGIF) devotional message, Copyright by Os Hillman, Marketplace Leaders.

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